Pet hates, pop star's nipples and your fortune!

Wha'gwarn?
I'm afriad I'm not feeling that inspired today folks, so I think you all know what that means?! Yep....more tits! I know it's not very original but it's fun none the less I'm sure you'll agree?
Did anyone see those photos of Madonna looking like one of Gunther von Hagen's Bodyworld's pieces?

Ouch! Well, to take your mind of that, here's a picture of her way back in the late 70s when she modelled for some dodgy arty/soft porn photographer. Much better don't you think? Nice pussy too...



I actually owned the Playboy issue from 1985 that published those photos! I got in in New York from the same vintage store that Madge goes into in Desperately Seeking Susan and buys that weird pyramid jacket thing. Alas, the shop isn't there anymore and some f*cker stole my Playboy years ago. Life's a bitch huh?

CAT READS YOUR FORTUNE AND WISHES YOU HAPPITY HOCKS



No, I've no idea what that means either...

On a far more serious note, guardian.co.uk posted a blog a little while ago asking for people's most hated phrases. Unfortunately I couldn't remember my login details or I would have had a field day. Here are a short list of mine...

POPPED IN
'I just popped into the shop quickly'. Oh please f*ck off.

BUMPED INTO
'How funny, I just bumped into Jack in Budgens'. Really? You physically knocked into him? No, you SAW him didn't you? That's it. No f*cking 'bumping' was invloved.

CHAT
'Have you got time for a quick chat?' No, go away you dullard.

CUPPA (often used in conjunction with all of the above to great effect)
'Random! I popped into Starbucks and bumped into Sally. We had a nice chat and a cuppa' DO ONE CHUNKY!

I think the problem I have is that all of the above phrases are used by what I call Normal Bloke TM. The man on the street. Joe Normal. Do you know what I'm getting at? No, nobody else I know seems to understand either. I realise that all of you use these words all the time and have no problem with it. Sorry. Rant over. There are many more phrases that make me want to be sick on my white trousers but I've got more boobs to fit into this blog so I'll save them for next time...

Check dis out doe..


And these...


Jay-Z's done alright for himself considering he looks a bit like a camel.

Right, last but not least, Rescue Cat is playing at 93 Ft East NEXT Friday the 7th August at a club night called Slipped Disco. Should be lots of fun. Please come along. IT'S FREE!



CAT FACT NUMBER 18:

Cat's urine glows under a black light

Later yeah?

RC x

Yacht Rock Party 06/07/09

What you sayin blaad?
A massive thanks for everyone who made it down to 93 Ft East last Monday to help celebrate the release of £10 Bag on itunes. I hope you all enjoyed the fine array of live music on show and the finest in yacht rock and 80s pop from our amazing DJs The Dallas Guild and Alex Morris.
I've got some excellent photos of the night courtesy of a very talented photographer called Ian Bines. Please check his shizzle out here.

Fiest up we had a few acoustic numbers from the delightful Aloosh who reminded me of late Talk Talk in places. Haunting and jazzy. Very nice. Apparently Aloosh is a Polish word for that grey/white fluff that gathers in your navel or something like that. Here's a picture of Jodie from the band...



Next up was a singer songwriter who had been highly recommended to me. Her name is Leila Adu and she's a Kiwi via Rome. Her music is very unique indeed and you'll have to go check out her myspace page as I can't really describe it properly. A bit blues, a bit performance art. She started the set singing from right at the back of the room which was funny. I could see that 'Oh here we go, another crack-head from the East End has wondered in off the street' look on a few people's faces but they soon got it...



Next up was some joker who dressed like he was sailing the Amalfi coast in some sort of 80s nightmare...




His band were good though and the cover of 'Don't Stop Believing' by Journey seemed to raise a smile-especially judging by backing singer Joanna's reaction here..




Next up were The Laurel Collective who never fail to fizz with energy and their melodic, twisting pop always makes me sit up and take notice. Their Keyboard player Mr Rainbow throws some great shapes too!...



Last, and arriving late as ever (but we'll forgive her as she was rehearsing with Kanyne West) was the brilliant Joy Joseph who once again had us skanking in the isles to her sunny blend of ska-tinged calypso. A great way to end the night...



Thanks to all those who gave up their time to play and all of you lovely people who made the effort to come along and support all the acts, it's appreciated. Now you can go and buy £10 Bag for all these free gigs I've given you! SEE BLOG BELOW FOR DETAILS!!!

Rescue Cat's next gig is at The Social on the 23rd July for Club Ugly. The night is free and it all kicks off at 8pm. We should be on nice and early.

CAT FACT NUMBER 14:

When a cat drinks, its tongue - which has tiny barbs on it - scoops the liquid up backwards!



In a bit yeah?..

Music that isn't free!

Word up!
A couple of years ago I got all sentimental and wrote a song called £10 Bag. It's about friendship. It's about 80s computer games. It's also about heroin addiction. I like to cover many bases...

That's me on the left aged about 7. The girl in the bobble hat is called Beth. I don't know where she is now but I hope she's ok. £10 Bag is dedicated to her and to the memory of childhood friends.

Click on this button and you can buy a fully mixed and mastered version of £10 Bag on itunes.

You can also click on this button to buy the song featuring grime star Wretch 32

Weird concept buying music isn't it? Wonder if it'll catch on?..

By the way, have you seen this cat?...



Peace!

'No-one knows who they were. Or, what they were doing..'

Yes bruv!
You enjoying this heatwave? I must say, it's tainted with a little sadness due to the fact that both Ana Ivanovic and Maria Sharipova are out of Wimbledon early AGAIN! I rememeber I wrote a similar post this time last year! Tedious!
I think instead of spending money on a new roof, they should promote the women's game more. Perhaps modify the dress code too? Something like this?..



Sorry, this weather is bringing out my baser instincts. You'll notice this blog is full of references to bottoms and stuff. Apologies...

So, I played at Glastonbury this year which is a nice touch. I was playing bass for the very talented Louise Golbey on the BBC Introducing stage. Click here to watch the performance. Luckily we got backstage passes which meant (a) no rubbing up against the great un-washed and (b) celeb spotting in the hospitality area. Well, I say celeb spotting but apart from the ginger one out of Girls Aloud, the most memorable moment was when Keith Allen asked me if I was in a queue for the food. Rock and f*cking roll man!
The musical highlight of the weekend, apart from Lady Gaga showing us all her arse.....



....was the return of the mighty Spinal Tap to the UK. I was standing next to these two guys who had built the original size model of Stonehenge as seen in the film (inches not feet) and it had taken them a week to do so! Good Effort!



Hopefully, this will expain all...



'Making a big thing of it would have been a good idea'. Classic!

So, don't forget, this Monday night at 93 Ft East I'll be throwing a little party to celebrate the digital release of £10 Bag. Bands and DJs all night for free plus edible CDs. Imagine that?! Please come down and say hello. If you can't make Monday, we are playing The lovely Abbey in Kentish Town the night after which is also free and has a great beer garden too.

See you at one or the other I hope?

Peas!

RC x